Yes, I took a hiatus. My intention was not to leave you hanging but it was all for good reason. I needed a break and I didn’t know how much I needed it until I actually took one. In short, breaks are wonderful. As I’ve put myself on pause, I had nothing left to do but live my life. I’ll explain.
Going to Barbados, which at first was my attempt to party all through Crop Over, (carnival for some who don’t know), and then to be with family, it also became a journey to being human. Nothing else. Before leaving, I was psyching myself out to write everyday, have a daily journal going but as soon as I felt that warm-embracing sun on my skin, my brain just shut down. Nothing came out right on paper and I suddenly realized that it was a time of absorbing and observation.
I did allowed this to happen and it was easy of course as I laid on the beach lol, (don’t hate me), but I recognized the more I am closer to my goals and gain popularity, I grab on to “La Vie Simple” even more closer. It balances me. It reminds me where I came from and do I see ever more clearer what is in front of me.
19 years has been the last time I’ve set foot on Bajan ground. I stayed in a small house up in the country with my cousins, shuffling through bush was where I had my best summers as a child. Don’t get me wrong, they weren’t country folks with no education and no sense of the real world and then, I came along. I was as city as it comes but I did love the goats and the rabbits they had out back. Now, we are grown, my cousins and I, they are working in hotels, government offices and organizations there and abroad and that “balance” is what got them to be who they are. I might be talking through family pride but don’t underestimate the power of Simplicity.
For with less, we can realize the power within ourselves and see how far we can go because all we got is ourselves.
Yes, I partied, partied like an animal even, (huh-hum), and did touristic things; saw the Scotland District,also known as “Far Away” and Harrison’s Cave. Through that process, I smiled, I hugged, I laughed, I danced, I shared, I watched, I taught, I spoke but most importantly, I breathed.
What really do we want? It is fame? Money? Jewelry? Mansions? Sounds nice and has its place but for some of us, who are on our chosen path, what we really want is to have the freedom to choose. Some of us want to have stability just to enjoy life.
I learned to breathe every step I make, not to hold my breath while I’m walking there. Not only will I pass out by not breathing but I will not be conscious to see clearly up ahead and to see the joys of life. Just being me, human, right now, loving in the process.
Reset. Reboot. I am back!